Safe spaces to share feelings

2nd October 2024

At Acorns, we always aim to give the best care possible. This care isn’t just physical – it’s also about supporting the emotional, mental, and spiritual wellbeing of everyone we support.

One important part of this support is dedicated to the siblings of the children we care for. It can be hard for siblings to cope when their brother or sister has complex care needs. Their lives can be challenging and can look very different from their friends.

While their school friends may sleep peacefully at night, these siblings might wake up in the middle of the night to find that their parents have had to rush their sibling to hospital. Some siblings share bedrooms with their brother or sister and find it hard to sleep because of noisy medical machines or frequent wake-up calls for medicine.

All of this can make these siblings feel anxious, sad, isolated, or angry.

Support for siblings

That’s why we believe it is so important for these siblings to get the right support. On this World Mental Health Day (Thursday 10th October), we are taking the opportunity to highlight the emotional and mental health support that we offer to siblings.

Acorns Sibling Worker Lucy Waterland, based from our Three Counties hospice, shared more about the amazing work our Sibling teams do to be there for the brothers and sisters of the children in our care.

Members of the siblings group holing tennis rackets.

“Above all, our support is about providing the time and safe space for these siblings to share with us what they are feeling,” Lucy said.

Safe spaces to share feelings

“These children have brothers or sisters with complex health needs and so recognising and validating their feelings – whether it’s anxiety, sadness, or anger – is hugely important,” Lucy told us.

Lucy shared some of the resources that help these siblings: “We focus on coping mechanisms and regulation strategies. We develop a toolkit, full of resources like breathing techniques, designed so that these children always have something to rely on, wherever they are.

“Many siblings find the 5-4-3-2-1 breathing technique, where you countdown from 5 whilst taking long and steady breaths, really helpful. It’s a discrete mechanism they can use wherever to ease their anxiety.

“For younger children, we have animal templates they can draw around to get the pace of breath just right,” Lucy shared.

A place of belonging

Sibling Groups are another big part of this support, helping children create friendships with other siblings in similar situations and relax in a safe space.

“It’s so rewarding when you can see their confidence grow,” Lucy says with a smile.

“One moment has particularly stayed with me. When asked to share the places he felt he belonged, one little boy mentioned our Sibling Group. In his words: “It helps me when I feel I’ve had enough and just want to chill – it gives me a couple of hours to relax my brain.”

“At the end of the day,” Lucy adds, “it’s about letting them be children.

“That’s why our Sibling Groups are so important. It gives children the time to just be themselves with others who understand what they’re going through.”

Try some mindful movement yourself

Mindful movement is a great way to improve mental health and is one of the many activities we use at Acorns to support siblings. Why not try fitness bingo with your children and the little ones in your life – can you cross off them all?